This week I received my first negative review on iTunes. I received a two-star review.
I'm not gonna lie...it stung for a moment. I thought what the heck?! Two Stars?? Do they know how hard I work to put this thing out every week?! Not my finest moment, but definitely an authentic one.
Up until that review I had been receiving five star, after five star review and I was feeling pretty fabulous and validated. Then that two stars brought me back down to earth and reminded me that not everyone is going to like what I am doing.
In fact, some people will dislike it so much that they will give me a 2/5, which if I were still in school would be a 40% which is a big, fat, F. Actually probably closer to a F-
I have over 100 reviews of my podcast and the average is 5 stars (actually now it is 4.99) so that means over 100 people love the meditations I put out each week and are enjoying what I am doing and sharing each week. But that one two-star review just stuck with me.
Why?? Why did I let that one review bother me so much? One answer- fear. This person had struck that deep dark fear we all have that people won't like us and we won't belong.
I have always had a fear of rejection. I have always had this voice in the back of my head saying "what if someone hates what you are doing/saying/standing for?" What then?
And honestly, I let that hold me back for a long time. When I was younger I would do things that would make me fit in, and slide under the radar without making too many waves, or really standing in my own light and not being afraid of people seeing me for who I really am.
But you know what? There are 7.4 BILLION people on this earth and they are not all going to like the same thing. Not everyone is going to like you. Not everyone is going to enjoy what you have to share in this world and that's just life.
And why should they? People having different ideas, tastes, and opinions is what makes up the beautiful mosaic of human life! It is essential to humanity. So it's about time that I faced my fear of standing alone, not being liked, and having someone not like what I have to say, but that is just part of the human experience.
This was the inspiration behind this week's meditation. Being rejected and vulnerably standing all alone in front of the world's stage is just one fear that I have. We all have fear. Everyday we experience it, but we do not need to let it control us!
So this week we are working on facing our fears and moving past them. This is the actual meditation that I use when I am struggling with a fear of mine. I have used this before big events, small worries, and to get over those fears that are deeply rooted in me that I didn't even realize I had at first.
If you haven't checked out the fear meditation yet you can listen to the whole things HERE.
Then you can check out my thoughts on fear by watching Vlog number 10 here.
Today I challenge you to ask yourself as you move through life "is this fear keeping me alive? Or is this fear keeping me from living?" It might just change the way you see everything.
Deepest Gratitude, Kelly
PS- Is it tacky to leave a plug for reviews for my podcast in this post?
I literally do a little jig with Mila every time a positive review comes in. Leave enough reviews and I might just show you that jig in my next vlog!